Whew, I spent the entire week doing nothing but optimization. I found out last week that Instanced Static Meshes have something called “Custom Data Values,” so I migrated a good chunk of the special effects I was previously handling with Procedural Meshes over to Instanced Meshes. Even though I majored in CS, I realized for sure that programming is just a tool to translate my thoughts, and coding itself really isn’t my thing. Anyway, I’ve migrated everything over. As for whether it’s faster than before… well, it feels like it’s faster. Since there are no visual changes, I don’t really have anything to show you. It confirmed that even if both are equally tiring, working on level design suits me much better. I plan to get back to level design starting tomorrow.
I went hiking for the first time since the move. My head was a bit cluttered, you see. Since it was unfamiliar territory, I just mindlessly followed where the trail signs pointed.
I kept walking, but nothing showed up. The climb was exhausting, and I had already forgotten what the destination was; I just kept following the path, hoping a way down would appear eventually. The one-way trail seemed endless, there was no one around, and as time passed, I started wondering if I should just turn back.
But strangely enough, even though it was my first time up this mountain, I felt a weird urge to see more of this new path. I didn’t want to retrace my steps, and my body was tired… and then, suddenly, I arrived at the peak.
It turned out to be the place I’d seen on the sign a while back. It didn’t mean anything other than being a name on a sign, but once I arrived at this destination I hadn’t really been thinking about, I found I could head back down the way I came without a second thought.
I thought to myself, “Wow, how childish and fickle am I?” Yet, I felt a strange sense of accomplishment. I had even worried briefly about not getting down before sunset because I couldn’t see the way down (even though I could have just turned back!). Maybe because it felt connected to my current situation of making a game all by myself, I felt proud.
Since it’s been a while since I hiked, my back and legs ache, but conversely, I feel refreshed. The world, and I, are just lumps of irrational contradictions.